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June 29, 2006
Question: I met a girl on the internet the other day. She seemed nice and all. We got to know each other and she wanted to go out with me. So I said yes! Now I found out she's ugly and she lives in Florida (which is miles away from New Hampshire, where I live). Should I dump her?
ANSWER: The distance takes care of that, doesn’t it? Just send a message that you are too far away.
You haven’t had enough of a relationship for a real dump. It’s like you only climbed onto the back of the truck and you’re holding on – barely – and the truck has just hit a bump in the road and . . . well, she fell off.
Wizard
June 28, 2006
Question: Dear Wiz,
I'm going to middle school and the day before graduation I ask this girl to be my girlfriend. She said yes and I've liked her for one year already and she likes me too. When I looked at her picture she looks not that pretty but when I see her in real life she looks like an angel to me. I'm so new to this girlfriend and boyfriend thing and I'm starting to have doubts about her. I mean I love her and all when we weren't going out but now that love is kinda fading away. Should I stay with her or break up?
ANSWER: It’s entirely up to you! If you are having fun, you should continue to date her until your doubts are no longer doubts. What the wizard means is this: If you aren’t sure, you can give her the benefit of the doubt until you are sure.
She’s thinking the same way – and, who knows, you both might grow into liking each other even more, or one of you might want to move on. Either way is okay.
Wizard
June 27, 2006
Question: Dear Wizard of Dump,
I have a girlfriend and we don't talk a lot. She is really shy and cute. I really liked her when we weren't going out but now that we are, I'm having doubts about her. She's really hot but should I dump her?
ANSWER: This question is like many that arrive at Dumpagirl.com. Short and simple, without much detail, except that the guy is having doubts and wants to know whether he should dump the girl.
The answer is the same to all. It is normal to begin having doubts about a girl you are dating. That’s a big part of dating. She’s fantastic at first and then you realize she isn’t quite the angel (or whatever vision you had) you thought she was. Don’t let that end the dating relationship. She’s also learning about you, and (LOOK OUT!) you might not be the prince (or whatever vision she had) she thought you were. But she doesn’t need to dump you.
Dating is supposed to be fun, and every date is self-revelation and a step forward in the quest for a good, long-term partner, friend, and lover. Doubts alone are okay – that’s part of it. You should continue dating until the doubts you have are resolved one way or the other.
When you’ve resolved your doubts to a point that you know you are not having fun anymore, or you know that she will never be the good, long-term partner, friend, and lover, then the time for a dump has arrived.
This is the answer for the many short questions of this kind. Here is a sampling of questions received by the wizard in the last few months that were not answered because they really don’t need an answer, other than the above:
“We dont talk alot but I think shes kinda hot should I dump her?”
“I'm kind of dating a girl that I have known for maybe three weeks. The other night I ran into an ex and things and old feelings surfaced again. What should I do? The ex is very hot.”
“should i tell her no because she went out with my friend?”
“i cant trust if my girlfriend is going out with some one else...(its a long distance relationship)”
“i dont no if i should dump my girl but here’s the thing she is always blowing me off to go out with other boys like now she’s been grounded and the 1st thing she’s doing is going 2 see another boy what shall i do?”
“I've tried to break up with her 3 times already.”
“She says she cant go back to our relationship right now, she doesnt feel the same.”
“Should I dump my girl, because I no long feel like I love her, And want to be with different woman.”
“she is blocking me and annoying me.”
“my girlfriend cheated on me and told me she was with a bunch of friends but i saw her . what should i do?”
Wizard
June 25, 2006
Question: i have a long distance relationship and it's hell for me. she say's that she loves me but she's not concerned about my feelings...at all and i always ask what she's thinking, how she's feeling, and about her day...so anyway she never asks me any of these questions...never....should i dump her?
ANSWER: If it’s hell for you, you should.
Wizard
June 14, 2006
Question: Hey Wiz,
I've been going out with a girl for a little over 15 months now, and over the last few weeks or so I've been slowly losing interest in her. I get on with her mates fine because most of them went to my school and we're now at the same college, but she doesn't get on at all with any of my other friends (in fact she kind of despises them). Our interests are really different (she likes cute cuddly things, and soccer, and I'm more into horror movies and action sports).
To make things worse, 3 days ago, a girl came to cover some hours at the store where I am supervisor (she works one of the other stores a little over 30 mins away), we got on really well (just as well as my girlfriend and I used to, if not better!) and exchanged numbers. I occasionally see or hear things that make me think of her, more so than my girlfriend.
I don't want to hurt my girlfriend's feelings (which would be REALLY REALLY easy to do, she gets hurt when I don't call! Not clingy, just over-sensitive ... OK, maybe a little clingy, but she has nothing else to do, she doesn't like going out to parties and stuff like that) but I'm just not happy with her any more. We're going on holiday in a few weeks and I can't break up with her now, but I don't want to lead her on any further, either way it'll hurt her.
Oh, and they both have no idea of each other's existence. I've really dropped myself in at the deep end this time. Help!
ANSWER: In the deep, but we don’t want you to drown.
The sinews of the connection between you have become so entangled and intertwined that pulling apart feels like ripping out your insides, at least for one of you, and it appears to be her. You’ll hurt her feelings no matter how you handle it.
If you haven’t dropped some hints, drop some, so she starts to get the message on her own. Even if you simply talk less, become less communicative about anything, she’ll notice and will eventually want to talk about it. That would be your opening to talk frankly about your relationship – about how it has deteriorated. You might find that she is thinking the same thing.
Wizard
June 2, 2006
Question: i left my old girlfriend in february. we had been dating a year and a half and i was in love, but I got sick of her. now i am with another girl. she treats me really good and we have a good time and things. now i think maybe the novelty has worn off. she liked me before i split with my old girlfriend, and is always jealous of her, and wants to replace her and stuff. now i find myself thinking of my old girlfriend and if I made the right decision back in february. i dont know if this is because the new girlfriend is too clingy. maybe i am scared of being committed again. the thing is i am moving in with my new girl for 3 months soon over summer. we will be living in the same house in different rooms. i feel like im in a massive mess and it is probably a lot my fault. help me out!!!
ANSWER: You’re thinking about it and you’re willing to understand your contribution to the problem. All of that is good.
See how things go over the summer. You are committed to living in the same house with the new girlfriend and she continues to show an obvious interest in you. You are in different rooms – so you can distance yourself when you need to. If the relationship with your new girlfriend solidifies, you’ll feel better about it and have fewer (or no) doubts. If it doesn’t, you’ll be out of the “same house situation” and can go back to the old girlfriend, or find a new one.
Enjoy your current relationship for all its worth. See what happens.
The mess is not massive – yet – and can be manageable if you (in your own mind) can give yourself some freedom and time to work things out. You’ll be all right.
Wizard
June 2, 2006
Question: I am with a nice girl, she in fact left her husband for me. She is hot in the sack and I do enjoy her company. But now she's a girlfriend with expectations. And I recently met a girl from France who wants to come see me and needs to book plane tickets. What should I do?
ANSWER: She left her husband and now she’s a girlfriend with expectations – hence what should you do when another girl wants to see you?
Tell her what an artist you are in the field of skullduggery.
Wizard
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